An Ode to Grand Ole’ Mickey D’s - David Janzen

poem read by Timothy Arliss OBrien

An Ode to Grand Ole' Mickey D's
David Janzen

Said Karl Marx to Buddha, sitting around the kitchen table

"Humanity needs unanimity if it wants to become stable."

Ray Kroc sat complaisantly, nodding and rocking his chair

watching the rival ideologies rile up the air.

"When the masses desire to overtake their physical realm

elitism, capitalism, all to overwhelm

only then will global accordance be finally achieved.

Tell me, Buddha buddy, has a better plan been conceived?"

Here, Buddha bent forward, his characteristic grin replaced

with a glare so persuasive that Marx's proud tone was effaced.

"Global Harmony," he said, "will never be reached politically,
for only violence and corruption prevailed where men tried to set themselves free.

Scrap the Zeitgeist, forget about changing the status quo,
self-actualization can only be reached by the individual soul.

By letting go of materialism and paying issues no mind

only then is fulfillment and purpose viable for humankind."

The argument wore on as Marx called Buddha a namby-pamby,

while Buddha said hiring men like Stalin was simply pretty chancy.

As the fight escalated, it grew increasingly uncouth

until Ray Kroc said he wanted to add his 2 cents of truth.

"Never mind the politics," he said, "it seldom completely gets things solved.

And spiritual elevation, well, people just don't want to get too involved.

For all this talk about unifying the masses, for that I have a special knack-

for who can resist the simple pleasure of a classic good ole' Big Mac?

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David Janzen is a Canadian writer based in Northern Taiwan. When he’s not exploring the

rivers, mountains, and concrete jungles of Asia, he enjoys writing satiric stories exploring the dark and ironic

edges of the human experience.